Sunday, March 02, 2014

The award for best self-created drama goes to Mia Farrow (Ava and C.I.)

Mia Farrow's gotten desperate.

In an attempt to garner headlines and market herself, she's crossed every line in the world.

For example, only a fake ass gives the Golden Globes permission to broadcast footage of her (from The Purple Rose of Cairo) in a segment honoring Woody Allen and then takes to Twitter to denounce the segment.

Mia's little fan brigade -- tiny as it is -- didn't seem to realize Mia was craven enough to make sure she was included in the segment she was 'protesting.'

And no one wants to point out that both she and her son Ronan waited until after the segment aired to be bitchy on Twitter.

They both knew Mommy wouldn't be in the segment if they attacked before it was aired.

Mia knows how to promote herself.

She knows damn little else, but she can self-promote.

Which is why, as last year was winding down, she grabbed headlines for the Maureen Orth profile of her in Vanity Fair, the one where she revealed baby boy Ronan may not be Woody Allen's son but Frank Sinatra's.

In the sixties, Mia was a minor soap actress (Peyton Place).  She'd never become a movie star.  Americans would never rush to a film because she was in it.  But in the soap opera, her love interest was Ryan O'Neal who would go on to have three blockbuster films (Love Story, What's Up Doc? and The Main Event) as well as some smaller but pleasing offerings.  Ryan became a movie star.  Mia just made the tabloids.

She set her sights on Frank Sinatra.

It was considered scandalous to some.  Her own mother publicly stated Sinatra should be dating her, not her young daughter.

But Mia was no naive waif.

When Frank refused to risk angering Big Nancy (his ex-wife and the mother of his children) by demanding that Mia be invited to a party Big Nancy was staging, Mia stayed home and chopped off her long locks.

She likes to pretend otherwise today but it was a tantrum over a party.

And it freaked Frank out, leaving him to wonder just how crazy she was?

He married her in 1966.  She was supposed to make the film The Detective with him but she was also supposed to be faithful to him.  He was very hurt that she spent the bulk of their brief marriage sleeping around  (John Phillips was only one of her many lovers during this period and Phillips was one of four that Frank had photographic proof of as a result of the detectives he had trailing her).  She was filming Rosemary's Baby in NYC when Frank reached his boiling point and served her with divorce papers -- he said he was disgusted over the crowded bed Mia occupied -- it was the swinging sixties and one partner in a bed seemed passe -- to Mia anyway.

In 1968, their divorce was final.

Mia then set her eyes on Andre Previn.  She'd have to get rid of his wife Dory first which is why (pregnant) Mia  didn't marry him until 1970.  They divorced (with cheating on both sides) in 1979.

In 1979, she began dating Woody Allen.  The two never lived together and their dating relationship never gave Mia what she wanted (a third husband).

Those details and others we wouldn't normally bring up.

But now we have to.  Mia explained to Maureen Orth that Frank might be the father of Ronan because, even though they divorced in 1968, they continued to sleep together.

Ronan was born at the end of 1987, so, if Mia's to be believed (always iffy), she slept with Frank on-and-off-again from 1968 to at least 1987.

This matters for many reasons but it matters most because Mia was trying to trap Woody into marriage.

She badgered him over and over about needing a baby by him -- this as she continued to adopt children.

She finally got him to agree after she promised he would not have any duties or obligations.

Basically, he would be the sperm donor.

That's how Mia sold it to him.

And it matters because, for nearly six months, they had no luck.

Woody and Mia tried.

But no pregnancy.

Mia leaves out all of those facts.

They won't make her look sympathetic.

But these are facts and they're facts that take on new meaning thanks to her 2013 revelation that she was having sex with Frank Sinatra at the time and he could be the father of Ronan.

Nearly six months.

And no pregnancy.

Then Mia sleeps with Frank and shortly after is pregnant?

If Mia's telling the truth, then Frank probably is the father.

But she doesn't tell the public the full truth because it'll make her look like the liar that she is.

Woody was in his early fifties at the time Mia became pregnant.

He had no biological children -- he still has no biological children if Ronan isn't his.

They tried for nearly six months and the eternally fertile Mia (who was telling friends she was on fertility drugs though she may not have told Woody that) couldn't get pregnant.

But then she has an assignation with Sinatra and ends up pregnant?

That means Mia is cruel and cold and calculating.

She didn't just know it was possible Sinatra was the father, she knew it was pretty much a given after the months and months of attempts with Woody.

About right now is where the audience on Jerry Springer starts booing.

And they would have a point.

A woman who willfully passes a child off as a man's son when he's not the son?

That's fraud.

When she passes the child off as Woody's son to the courts, that's fraud as well.

When she takes child support from Woody Allen for this child that she knows isn't his?

That's fraud.

We had no reason to discuss any of this until Mia decided she needed attention.

And then she and Dylan worked on further attention.  Her daughter put her name to a 'letter' that most believe Mia wrote.

The letter wasn't just about Woody Allen -- whom Dylan insists molested her as a child in August of 1992.

No, the letter wanted to demonize others, like Diane Keaton, who had worked with Woody or were friends with him.

Mia had already gone too far in the eyes of the entertainment industry with her Tweets which were seen as especially insulting to Keaton, and now she was going after Keaton and other actors when she begged Nicholas Kristof (Iraq War insisting columnist who went on to greater 'fame' by purchasing women overseas) to print the letter written by  Dylan or 'Dylan.'

Mia was surprised to discover that, as she put it to one NYC friend last month, "I'm dead in Hollywood."

Mia, Mia, not just Hollywood.

If she hadn't overplayed her hand, her daughter might be believed.

But Mia had to go all Jerry Springer on America and it wasn't the first time.

Her soap opera nearly derailed the 1992 presidential election.

America had had more than enough of it by the end of summer 1992.

But many were on her side then and recently.

Yet she couldn't leave well enough alone.

Like a robber returning to the scene of the crime, she wanted to stir things up in 2013.

We have no idea what happened to Dylan.  She may have been molested, she may not have been.

But like her mother, she makes no sense and isn't believable.

It's interesting that she (or Mia) will blame Diane Keaton and call her out in public when Diane is not Dylan's parent and has never molested her and only encountered Dylan (who was a small infant) on the set of Radio Days.  (Diane performs a musical number in that Woody Allen film.)

She questions Diane Keaton, but Dylan's full of nothing but praise for Mommy Mia.

It takes a special kind of woman to pimp her own daughter.

If Woody did molest Dylan (we have no idea), we're not talking about a stunned and unknowing Mia.  No, she was as much a part of her daughter's misadventure as Susan Sarandon's character was to Brooke Shields in Pretty Baby.

Maureen Orth loves facts.

If she can make them pliable.

She's a wonderful novelist, she can write a narrative.

But like her late husband Tim Russert, she struggles to nail down facts.

Last week's editorial opened with this, "The laughable and sad Natalie Russell (The Pitt News) will get served next week."  We were looking for a new way to write about the  March 12, 2006 gang-rape and murder of Abeer Qassim Hamza al-Janabi, when it became obvious the way to write about the man who killed her parents and her sister, took part in the gang-rape of her and then shot her dead was to note how yet again certain writers (Natalie Russell among them) wanted to write superficial pieces about celebrity instead of taking on real issues.

Natalie Russell?

She had to add a little note to her piece and redo it:

Correction: A previous version of this article deemed Mr. Allen's previous relationships pedophiliac. While it was alleged, Mr. Allen has not been convicted of being a pedophile. Thus, the language was removed.

Russell's too stupid to be allowed to operate a keyboard without a guardian present.

Where did dumb ass get her misinformation?

It's been popularized -- and called "facts" -- by Maureen Orth.  It's shady and dishonest.  And at a time when VanFair's war on Gwyneth Paltrow is already making some in the entertainment industry leery of the magazine, is it really the the time to be offering such nonsense?

Orth writes:

2.   Allen had been in therapy for alleged inappropriate behavior toward Dylan with a child psychologist before the abuse allegation was presented to the authorities or made public. Mia Farrow had instructed her babysitters that Allen was never to be left alone with Dylan.

The doctor didn't rule the behavior to be sexual.  The doctor felt that Woody's attention to the child (amount and focus) was inappropriate.

Mia had been saying it was sexual, yes.  She had said that for some time.

When the doctor observed an encounter with the two she told Mia that she felt Woody's focus on Dylan was inappropriate and demanding.

She did not feel there was a sexual component to it.

Maureen damn well knows that but she wants to present 'facts' that back her up.

We're glad she whored.

She was married to Tim, of course, she's a media whore.

By whoring, she lets us bring up something that all Natalie Russells in the world better damn well pay attention to.

According to Mia, there was relief (on her part) when the doctor wanted to address the focus issue. According to her, she had felt that it was sexual attention.

So, if Mia's telling the truth, why did Mommy pimp her daughter?

Woody wasn't Dylan's father at that time.  Why didn't Mia stop the attempts at adoption?

Yes, she has one of her poor-me excuses that she trots out.

But the reality is, if she thought Woody's behavior was sexual towards Dylan, she never should have let the man adopt her daughter.

Natalie might also want to ask why Mia didn't demand prosecution?  Or Dylan for that matter?

Maureen wants you to know the 'fact' that Mia didn't go to the police.

Of course she didn't.

She didn't go to the police and she didn't fight for a trial.

And she and her daughter waited until any legal statute of limitations ran out to raise the whole tired issue one more time.

If Dylan Farrow were an honest person, she wouldn't be defending Mia.

If she really was assaulted by Woody Allen, that's on Mia as much as it is on Woody.

Mia should have refused to allow him to adopt Dylan since, according to her story, she knew years prior to the adoption that Woody was sexually inappropriate with Dylan.

Mia doesn't talk about that much.

Or about all the money Woody gave her over the years prior to 1992.

We're not talking about her salary.  We're talking about gifts.

At one point, Woody gets $7 million for doing a Japanese TV commercial and he gives Mia, who didn't appear in the ad and had nothing to do with it, a million dollars.

We're talking about gifts like that -- we're talking about what Mia doesn't want anyone to talk about.

Even lying to the city of NYC to keep the rent control price of her mother's apartment, Mia lived outside her means and then some.  She was paid well for appearing in Woody's films but not enough to take care of her brood of countless children.

She needed those gifts from Woody because there wasn't much interest in her by 1980.

Broadway?  Mia was doing Broadway, Romantic Comedy with Tony Perkins.  It was a success but the backstage drama ensured neither Mia nor Tony was sought after for another Broadway play.


Mia was not a film star.  Ever.

Linda Blair was and is a bigger star than Mia.

She was the lead in Roman Polanski's classic film Rosemary's Baby.  Yet she was so ineffective in the role that when a sequel was made as a TV movie, many critics felt the need to stress how much more believable Patty Duke was in the role of Rosemary.

The only box office hit of her career was followed by bomb after bomb.

Secret Ceremony, A Dandy in Aspic, John and Mary, See No Evil, bomb, bomb, bomb.  And she fled to England where she would have stayed if it weren't for Ali MacGraw leaving Robert Evans for Steve McQueen.  Evans, head of Paramount at the time, needed an immediate replacement for MacGraw who was to play Daisy in The Great Gatsby.  One actress after another turned the role down.  Scraping the bottom of the barrel, they offered it to Mia who couldn't pass up the chance to show the world how awful she could be.

Mia had been miscast before, but this time it was just sheer awful as she played Daisy as if she were a scream queen and Gatsby was written by Ira Levin.

This was followed with the Canadian bomb Full Circle (Mia in another horror film), then there was what many considered her all time worst performance -- Buffy in Robert Altman's A Wedding.

This was followed by the box office bomb Avalanche which starred Rock Hudson.

Then came her freaky and fifth billed performance in Death on the Nile (a role she appears to be acting out currently).

Next was 1979's bomb Hurricane and her film career was over.

That's why she ended up on Broadway.

Some say that's why she pursued Woody Allen.

When she finally returned to the screen it would be in his film A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy (1982).  It would be the first of fourteen live action films she'd appear in from 1982 to 1992.   With the exception of her bit part at the beginning of Supergirl, all the films were Woody Allen films.

With Woody as her director, she'd give some classic performances: Zelig, Broadway Danny Rose, Radio Days, New York Stories, possibly Hannah and Her Sisters.  But she also was so-so in some of the movies and flat out awful in Shadows and Fog, Another Woman and September.  She'd be Golden Globe nominated for Broadway Danny Rose, The Purple Rose of Cairo and Alice.  She'd be  BAFTA nominated for The Purple Rose of Cairo and Hannah and Her Sisters.

She would claim that during this time she was offered Father of the Bride -- and she was.  But then they found out they could get Diane Keaton and had no interest in Mia.

Immediately after the 1992 scandals, she kept insisting Mike Nichols was going to cast her but he had no role for her in Wolf or The Birdcage or Primary Colors or . . .  She'd been convinced that she would be his new muse but, for once, she wasn't able to make a married man fall for her.

No one wanted her.  Miami Rhapsody wanted so badly to be Woody Allen-esque but it wasn't and the film bombed.  As did Reckless, Coming Soon, -- really everything she's done except for her bit part in the remake of The Omen.

It's very sad for Mia.  As she told her children in 1992 -- after she told them Woody was having an affair with her adult daughter Soon-Yi Previn -- she might never work again.  That's why she was so furious when Woody announced that they would not be making Manhattan Murder Mystery together (he replaced her with Diane Keaton)

Yes, Mia was willing to make a film with Woody.  In fact, according to her, she was sleeping with Woody up until August of 1992.  Determined to get him back.  Even though July 4, 1992 found him isolating with Dylan in her words.

So if Dylan believes she was molested (and she may have been), she needs to start aiming a lot of anger at her useless mother who put more thought and concern into having a film career than she did into protecting her daughter from a man she claimed was sexually interested in her.

And let's go back to Orth.

Mia's at Frog Hollow.  Woody has to travel a distance to get there (from NYC) and doesn't show up unannounced.

"Mia Farrow had instructed her babysitters that Allen was never to be left alone with Dylan."

Really, Maureen Orth?

You think that looks good for Mia?

It doesn't.

His visits were rare and usually short.  If Mia was concerned -- as she insists she was -- that Woody was or would sexually abuse her daughter, her ass should have been at her Frog Hollow home every minute Woody was there.

What was she doing?

She wasn't off acting in a film, she wasn't promoting a film, she was just running around for fun.

You don't do that.

Not if  a man you think is a child molester is with your daughter.

You don't disappear.

You never hear claims that your daughter was missing for 20 minutes because you never let her out of your sight.

If it happened, it happened because Mia shirked her duties as a mother.

July 4, 1992, Mia's claiming Woody monopolized Dylan, took her away from the party and, pay attention Orth, out of Mia's site.

So if she was truly worried, her ass should have been at the house in August for every minute Woody Allen was present.

Now these are details that were made public by Mia in 1992.

Notice how they've vanished in the efforts to make Mia a saint.

In her 'facts,' Orth insists, "Dylan’s claim of abuse was consistent with the testimony of three adults who were present that day."

Yes, but was inconsistent with the testimony of one adult present (Monica Thompson, whose salary was paid by Woody Allen).  And we're fine noting Woody paid the woman.  Mia paid  two adults on her side and her friend Casey Pascal paid the third.  We don't have the need to present 'facts' that aren't the full facts.

We'd like this to be our last story about trashy Mia Farrow.

But we can go further.

We can explain, for example, what Mia doesn't want you to know, about why she never should have had Ronan to begin with (that's not a slam at Ronan, that is noting the health issue that 'miracle mom' didn't want to talk about then or since).  We can talk about that.  We can air all the dirty laundry.

We're free to do that for a number of reasons.

First, Mia disgraced herself with her assertion regarding Ronan's paternity.  Second, she chose to be in the tribute she then Tweeted against.  Third, she's been a real bitch in going after Diane Keaton.  Fourth, who the hell is this unaccomplished actress to try and destroy Cate Blanchett's chance to get an Academy Award for Best Actress.  Fifth, Naomi Campbell is a friend and we do not forgive Mia.

But mainly because we're sick of Mia and her witch hunt.

If Woody Allen did molest Dylan, Mia's little stunts haven't helped her daughter deal with reality.

Twenty-two years later, Dylan Farrow and her mother are trying to try this in the press.

You better find another way for closure.

This is America.  And in the United States, you are innocent until proven guilty.

Woody Allen has never been found guilty.

He's an elderly man who's being dragged through the mud.

That's not justice in America.

Dylan had many years to pursue a legal case against him.

She chose not to.

Woody Allen's been found guilty of nothing and people need to stop rushing to insist otherwise.

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 Unported License.
Poll1 { display:none; }