Dear Third Estate Sunday Review

Ty spent a lot of time in the e-mails this week for which we thank him. He ran across a number of e-mails that needed a reply. We'll provide that in this feature.

Brainhell (her/his parents must have hated her/him!) felt the need to write not once, but twice both on the same day (the 18th of December).

First, Brainhell wrote to inform us of something:

Journalism is sometimes referred to as the FourthEstate, the first three being Congress, theexecuctive, and the courts. Not sure why you namedyour blog "Third Estate..." Maybe I am missing thepoint or the joke.
brainhell

While that was an "interesting" e-mail (Brainhell is short on facts), s/he then received the automated reply that goes out to everyone that e-mails and it was apparently too much for the poor soul:

I thinkit's really funny that you're self-importantenough to have an auto-reply email to comments on ablog whose title broadcasts your ignorance! Hoo!


Brainhell, now should those that have so much difficulty finding their space bar on the keyboard really toss stones? No. No.

As for ignorance, cut yourself off a slice because you've earned it. As with most of the big whineys, the world is the world immediately around them. That may mean, for instance, that if they're White, everyone else must be White as well. In Brainhell's case, that must mean that if there are "estates" in the United States, that must be why we picked our name and, according to Brainhell, picked it wrong.

Silly, provincial Brainhell, not everything revolves around the US. Had you gone to the entry from our first edition (use the archives), you would have found "Welcome to the Third Estate."
Let's note the opening paragraph of that article:

The "Third Estate" refers to the French National Assembly and how members from the Third Estate were seated on the left with members of the First Estate sitting on the right. From this, we get our terms for "left wing" and "right wing." The Third Estate Sunday Review is left wing.

Is that clear enough for you? We could ask Isaiah to draw you a picture if it isn't. But we really don't have time for additional tutoring. We understand that many libraries offer literacy programs. Oh, wait. Libraries. Okay, it's the building where they house books, documents, periodicals . . . Periodicals. Okay, they are magazines and journals. No, not diaries. Brainhell, we really can't help you. You need someone who can provide the remedial skills that you are sorely lacking in. We wish you all the best though we fear you'll have trouble grasping that as well. Hoo! back at you.

A writes about several things but it reads like "blah blah blah" until the P.S. which we'll note here:

P.S. A beta reader would not be a bad idea in your line of business.

A, what line of business would that be? We're not in any online business. We don't accept ads. We don't whore ourselves out to the chat shows. We're failing to see what line of business you think we're in. But before suggesting products (perhaps you sell beta readers?) you might want to study your e-mail and notice your own usage. Probably not a good idea to lecture someone in a p.s. when you've struggled with the use of the article "an" throughout your e-mail. (And lost.) If we're ever in the market for a beta reader, we'll look you up.

We wonder if A also e-mailed The New York Times which had three printing errors this week on the front page? Obsessive A apparently isn't happy selling her wares and wishes to branch out from beta reader to spell checker. There's no position open here, A. Should you find one, you might want to grasp that some words, such as "colour," are neither typos nor mistakes but alternate spellings used for flavor. ("Colour," for instance, is the British spelling for what you know as "color.") You might also grasp that when you're disputing a word's usage, probably a good idea to check the context of the sentence. Elaine, for instance, using a psych term isn't necessarily going to be the same as a definition in whatever general use book you're pulling down from your own shelves.

Ironically enough, we make frequent typos. A wasn't able to stumble upon any of those which is actually more frightening than the fact that she thought she had. These are all night sessions. This isn't a "business." We adopt the Mamas and the Papas attitude of being professional when possible but never being a "professional." (A's thumbing through her Webster's in a panic on that one.) Whomever is doing the last draft may alter part of a sentence in a hurry and not realize that more should have changed. Or after we pass the twelve hour mark of staring at copy, we may miss a typo that stands out to others. Guess what? We don't give a damn. We pour everything we have into making this the best it can be and then we move onto next week.

Something that the Moronic Mars racists are unable to do.

Tammi claims that she is a feminist and a fan of the website that suffers from "War Got Your Tongue?" which may explain why she's confused about the term "feminism." Let us help you out, Tammi, we know of no feminist who would slam African-Americans with the n-word. You, however, do so frequently. Maybe your preferred website failed you? Someone did because racism isn't a part of feminism.

Maybe we could introduce you to Katey who wondered, "What's wrong with a girl being a girl? Girls don't like to hang around other girls. When I was in high school, I didn't. Veronica Mars reflects life."

Katey, it certainly reflects something. As you Queen Bee it and find comfort in Veronica Mars, we're wondering if you don't think there's something a bit sad about a self-described "33 year-old" "devoted" to a TV show about teenagers? We kind of do. Your 52K e-mail on the glories of Veronica Mars strikes us as excessive. Point 43 stood out:

43) Lots of girls lie about rape. I'd bet that 98% of all the rapes weren't even rapes. They were just girls who couldn't deal with sex.

Possibly this 'enlightened' attitude explains why a thirty-three year-old woman is obsessed with a TV show about teenagers?

Apologies to our regular readers, some of whom have worked out some excellent gag e-mails from Bully Boy and Condi. We'll try to note those before the end of the month; however, Ty had to wait through this and other nonsense all week. Whose worse, Republican lobbyists (who still haven't forgiven us over an editorial on John Roberts -- people, he got confirmed, you can stop being so upset about our editorial) or Moronic Mars fans? Moronic Mars fans. None of the Roberts' supporters use the n-word in their e-mails.