Sunday, March 13, 2011

Goose (Parody)

goose tracks

Goldsby and Covington by Boots Malone
Goldsby and Covington have been a lot in recent news and TV, second to the issues in Japan. What does it all mean? Square Pegs, Charles In Charge, White Snake, Wham, "Let The Music Play," Rubik's Cube, Win, Lose Or Draw. What it all boils down to is More . . .

Toots #102 by Gilley d'Bob
I will never be satisifed. Life is one constant search for the betterment for me.
-- Jayne Mansfield, author, violinist, thespian

As the self-appointed leading Marxist of the non-self-identifying Marxists, I am the lifeblood of whatever blood flows through the veins in America, irregardless of the miniscule and puny and small brains throughout the country or possibly as a result of them, I stand supreme as I only I can stand when I plant both of my feet on the ground, side by side or possibly partially splayed, I stand as always do, upright, possibly leaning or slouching, knowing that I and I alone can lead because when a man such as I feels that I need to do something then you better believe that I do it and I will and I have and I shall but I am troubled by the thought that so much falls on my shoulders for I am but yet one person and More . . .

The Marching Imperialist And The Military-Peace-Industrial-Pre-Fabricated-Complex by Lily Krenshka
In her timeless novel The Bitch (1979), Jackie Collins was all too aware of the plutocrats and the corporatists and the neo-pagans and Pansy Division and all that drives the imperialist desire for more and more jabbing and sticking and invasion, "Vannessa, Leonard, and a whole group of people arrived at 'Hobo' as Fontaine's guests. She watched the women's reactions to Steve. Nothing special. 'Do you fancy him?' she whispered to Vanessa. 'He's not Tony.' 'F**k Tony. I'm sick to death of hearing about Tony. He's not the only stud in the world you know.' Fontaine drained her champagne glass, and gestured for more." Yet Collins recognized the other dangers as well More . . .

The Vanishing of Olbermann by Dr. Mathilda West
The most pressing issue today is the Vanishing of Keith Olbermann from MSNBC leaving only the skilled and highly intelligent Rachel Maddow to steer us in the direction that, as right thinking Socialists, we should go because who is more trusted by Socialists than centerist Democrats working for a multi-corporation which not only delivers bad cable but has also destroyed the Hudson River? With that in mind and so much more More . . .

The Rent Of Capital by Gloria Coogle
"We're dying in America to come into our own" sing Roger and Mark in the fantastic musical Rent whose text and score provide a modern retelling of Karl Marx's The Poverty of Philosophy. Mimi nods to the Young Hegelians throughout but most obviously in her decision to sleep with the landlord which, as so often happens, leaves her hooked on heroin and dying. "We're dying in America to come into our own." And not only does it retell Marx, it anticipates the going-ons in Wisconsin today via the drag queen Angel who, like the union workers marching and chanting in the last weeks, strikes the notes as a percussionist. Not to mention that who but Joanne Jefferson could stand in for Governor Walker? And how do you measure, drive, measure progress More . . .

Goose 10th Anniversary Interview conducted by Lt Katy Whitcomb
Gilley, how do you feel on the tenth anniversary of Goose?

I feel tired and older. And that's like a tenth of a century. Makes me think.

Goose's main attraction is that it features exclusive content.

Correct. I do not understand CounterPunch, Truthout, et al and why anyone would ever visit those sites when so much that they offer can be found everywhere else. I insist upon one of a kind -- even if that means I publish a lot of irregulars. But what is life but a pair of Wrangles with one side straight leg and one side boot cut? It is in life's irregularities that we discover my own beauty and wisdom for I think therefore I type.

And yet Goose does not pay for any of the content they run.

When you look like me, you never pay for it. And that's how I like it. Of all our contributors, I believe I am most proud of Michael Stowell who not only wrote for us for free but did so while homeless. I tell you, when I can short-sell a guy like Stowell, I feel really good, I feel real really good. Like Arianna Huffington making her AOL deal. In fact, we're in talks at Goose to merge with internet search engine Archie.
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