Sunday, February 19, 2006

Humor Spotlight: Wally's "This Just In! Things Go Wack When Cheney Plays Jacks!"

Wally's been on a hot streak for two weeks now. We think it's great. He worries what happens Monday when he posts next. We're sure The Daily Jot will be just as funny. Here's one of our favorites from last week.


THIS JUST IN! THINGS GO WACK WHEN CHENEY PLAYS JACKS!

BULLY BOY PRESS - DC.

THIS JUST IN!

MONDAY NIGHT, VICE PRESIDENT DICK CHENEY DISLODGED THE LEFT EYE BALL OF LABOR SECRETARY ELAINE CHAO IN WHAT IS BEING DESCRIBED AS "A NASTY GAME OF JACKS."

WHITE HOUSE REPORTERS WERE FIRST INFORMED OF LAST NIGHT'S GAME AT APPROXIMATELY 4:40 PM TODAY.

WHITE HOUSE LAP DOG SCOTT MCCLELLAN TOLD REPORTERS, "HEY, THE DICKSTER PLAYS TO WIN. WHAT CAN I SAY?"

DETAILS KNOWN AT THIS TIME INDICATE THAT THE GAME BEGAN ON FRIENDLY TERMS BUT SOON TURNED VIOLENT AS BOTH PLAYERS ADVANCED TO "TWO-SIES."

AS VICE PRESIDENT CHENEY TOSSED THE BALL INTO THE AIR, SECRETARY CHAO WAS HEARD TO SAY, "I'M GOING TO CREAM YOUR ASS. I WAS THE FIRST GRADE JACKS CHAMPION."

EMITTING A BEASTLY GROWL, DICK CHENEY USED HIS RIGHT THUMB TO GOUGE OUT CHAO'S LEFT EYE.

WHITE HOUSE MARKATEER ANDREW CARD IS CALLING THE CONFRONTATION "A TRIUMPH FOR THE RIGHT" AND SPINNING THE INCIDENT AS A BATTLE BETWEEN RIGHT (THUMB) AND LEFT (EYE).

SECRETARY CHAO COULD NOT BE REACHED FOR COMMENT. WHEN HER OFFICE WAS CONTACTED, THE PRESS WAS TOLD SHE HAD LEFT THE COUNTRY FOR A "RETREAT" WHICH SOME WAGS ARE SAYING WILL TAKE PLACE AT GUANTANAMO BAY.

EARLY REPORTS HAVE VICE PRESIDENT CHENEY MOUNTING THE EYE ON A PLAQUE WHICH WAS THEN HUNG IN HIS OFFICE. THE BULLY BOY WAS OBSERVED GIGGLING AND POINTING AT IT SHORTLY AROUND NOON TODAY.

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"Reality check via Monica Benderman"






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