Monday, September 03, 2018

TV: AMAZON peddles fear and hate

Abbie Cornish is good at playing Daddy's dumb little girl.  Is that it?  Watching AMAZON's new JACK RYAN series, we wondered what kind thing we could say about it?


We'd love to tell you that John Krasinski is worth watching but that would be a lie.  Abbie has to show her boobs, erect nipples and all, for a 'love' scene -- typical b.s., love is defined in the male world that is JACK RYAN via nudity -- but even taking a shower, Jack's butt is obscured by glass.

Jack Ryan?  Did the world ever need him?  The match stick hero of many a bad Tom Clancy book existed to remind everyone that Danielle Steele was more rooted in reality than Clancy.  Clancy's dead and so is his hero -- at least on the large screen.

After 9/11, Jack struggled on the big screen.  THE SUM OF ALL FEARS, for example, became the first film of the series to fail to cross the $200 million mark.  JACK RYAN: SHADOW RECRUIT did even worse, failing to make it to $60 million domestically.

All we were saying was: give peace a chance and put this war porn in a cold locker.

But AMAZON's never been one to grasp reality -- they did, after all, air two seasons of HAND OF GOD.  And that explains how they ended up with JACK RYAN (no, even the PARAMOUNT NETWORK didn't want it).

John Krasinski walks around blandly throughout the entire eight episodes.  You're more likely to see one of his chest hairs blown out of place than any actual emotion cross his face.  To try to give him a regular guy appeal, they shoot a lot from his left side -- it's his left nostril that will make you squeamish.  He's not as chatty as he was in THE OFFICE but any 'conversation' is all recap so it probably doesn't matter.

Does it matter that he's wasting his best looking years on this garbage?

If he thinks it doesn't, he might want to take a look at Matt McCoy.  McCoy wasn't even old enough to be drafted for the Vietnam War but now the former WE GOT IT MADE lead is so old looking that he can convincly play a character who served in Vietnam with the President of the United States.  John, looks fade quickly.  Your acting chops aren't going to provide a long career, invest wisely.

For some reason, Daddy's girl Abbie Cornish falls for him.  She's self-abusing enough to endure looking like an idiot when this State Dept man she's sleeping with turns out to be CIA.  Striving for Daddy's love taught her to beg like a dog.

The only other woman of prominence is Hanin Ali played by Dina Shihabi.  Well, Dina tries to play the role.  It's less a character and more of bumper sticker.  Hanin is the good Arab -- yes, in eight episodes, the highly racist series does manage to feature one good Arab.  Hanin is a good Arab because she wants to go to Europe or to the US with her children.  She does not want to be part of the Arab world.  We're supposed to root for her for that reason.  We're supposed to root for her even more when she provides details to the US military that will lead to the deaths of Arabs.

We're never supposed to question the portrayals of Arabs or, in fact, why the hell this garbage is being made in 2018.

But we should question.

Are there no Arabs that work for the CIA?  For the US military?  Apparently, we're supposed to be thrilled by the 'diversity' that allows Wendell Pierce to play the sole American of color.

If there was a reason for AMAZON to make JACK RYAN it was to offer some solid gay erotica.  Instead, they've sold us more anti-Arab garbage that encourages us to fear and hate.  We'd say, "They ought to be ashamed," but we're sure that they are and jerking off as some man or woman beats them with a riding crop.

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