It's Alright Ma (I'm Only Boring)

Well forget that wars are waging across the globe, forget that the economy is tanking, Bob Dylan's selling nostalgia and that's apparently going to save the world! Possibly cure cancer as well.

Tom Palaima tells you, if you were born between 1925 and 1955, Bobby's pulling a Wilco -- trying to break your heart! He's peddling nostalgia which will teach about our commonalities in a disconnected nation:

With hundreds of cable stations, we no longer share a common experience at the one communal hearth we used to have: television. Remember three national networks, Huntley and Brinkley and Uncle Walter Cronkite?

Hundreds of cable stations preventing us from sharing a common experience? We won't argue pro or con on that, but we'll wonder how Palaima finds the salvation to that in a program airing on XM radio which offers over 150 channels to its subscribers?

We'll also note that he underplays one key development -- Dylan's splicing in commercials. On XM radio -- where the selling point is no commercials! Give up free radio and come to XM which is commercial free!

That change actually happened earlier. Some of the music channels began featuring commercials earlier -- the ones run by Clear Channel. Yeah, you read that right, XM's in business with Clear Channel, a company that's done more to destroy the local feel of radio than nearly anyone else and it's not mentioned in this . . . What is it?

Yet another hommage to Dylan? As he continues to age, we assume we'll next be applauding his bowel movements. (Actually, we'll next be applauding his 'hipness' with his 'shout out' to Alicia Keys on his upcoming album.) Or, as Richard Goldstein noted, "As Dylan's original fans age, some feel a need to make the icon of their youth into an eternal object of worship."

Which explains how a column about a show selling a form of nostalgia (topics include "Mothers" and "Fathers") that would make Oprah's ratings tank is being hailed as some sort of political act.
Probably helps, when noting all the tunes Bobby's spinning, to over look the fact that the long list of names includes only one woman (Kitty Wells). We're sure some keen mind can find that revolutionary and good for our commonalities as well.

Joni Mitchell once told Cameron Crowe about being on the Queen Mary with Dylan. Since they were both painters, he asked her how she'd capture the Paul McCartney party they were both attending? Mitchell's response showed up in her song "Paprika Plains:"

The rain retreats
Like troops to fall on other fields and streets
Meanwhile they're sweet talking and name calling
And brawling on the fringes of the floor
I spot you through the smoke
With your eyes on fire
From J&B and coke
As I'm coming through the door
I'm coming back for more!
The band plugs in again
You see that mirrored ball begin to sputter lights
And spin
Dizzy on the dancers
Geared to changing rhythms
No matter what you do
I'm floating back
I'm floating baack to you!

Dylan's own solution was to ignore the events around him and focus on a cup of coffee and, later, to write "One More Cup of Coffee" where he needs that java joe between listing (again) all the faults of a woman. It's been a long decline and a steady retreat from the world around. Now he's styling himself as a more sedate Wolfman Jack and the usual suspects rush in to hail it as "revolutionary!" (The applauding of his retreats can be traced back to some misguided praise for New Morning.)

It's as though he lifts a pinkie and the aging crowd hollers, "Look at that movement! He's the new Twyla Tharp!" For those who didn't drink the Kool Aid, the reaction is more along the lines of Jane Fonda's character in Cat Ballou, upon meeting the infamous gunslingers many years after their prime, "You got old."

Considering the early deaths of Phil Ochs, Richard Farina, Cass Elliot, Brian Jones, the Holy J trinity (Janis, Jim and Jimi) and assorted others, just being around and breathing may be something. We're don't think, however, it qualifies as the second coming of Art.

In the end, we think Goldstein nailed the (then unaired) program and its target audience quite well:

And now there's DJ coming to the XM pay-radio network. Starting May 3 he'll go head to cred with Howard Stern, chatting up guests, answering e-mails and spinning platters of his eccentric choosing around selected themes (e.g., weather, dancing, whiskey). Those who knew him as the most inspirational voice of the 1960s can tune in to reconnect with their memories through this show. Those who fell away when he found God can hear what's most admirable about Dylan now: his musical erudition and his bond with what critic Greil Marcus calls "the old, weird America," the land of dusty 78s and desperate dreams. XM is betting that Theme Time Radio Hour With Your Host Bob Dylan will draw a very desirable demographic: haute boomers who are used to paying for premium channels and premium everything.