How Green Was Her Valley

I had not been quite this crazy since the spring of 2003, when my new French au pair had up and quit on the eve of the Iraq war ("It's too dangerous here"), which happened to be the very week when my book (of which I had not written a word) was officially due to its publisher. Back then, I’d become mentally paralyzed, unable to decide for days whether to order a basic or deluxe Hello Kitty package from Birthday Express. Now, it was chocolate: double boiler or not?

Reading the above, you might think it was a monologue written for Megan Mullally to deliver on the debut of The Karen Walker Show. Sadly, that's not from a comedic sketch or any kind of a put on, it's from the mind or 'mind' of Judith Warner. And even sadder, she's deadly serious.



Over 4,700 foreign service members have died in the Iraq War. But the biggest tragedy of the illegal war but the real tragedy is what happened to Judith Warner. Over 1.5 million Iraqis have died in the Iraq War. Iraqis will suffer birth defects for generations to come as a result of the depleted uranium and other chemical warfare. But the biggest tragedy of the illegal war is Judith Warner's loss of an au pair.

How green was her valley?

Plenty green . . . because it was full of her s**t.