Sunday, July 10, 2016

Bringing in the sleaze

As if to justify all we wrote last week in "Who killed the romantic comedy?," along comes the hideous John DeFore.

Picking his ass crack and smearing the fecal matter across his keyboard, he calls it writing as he explains and ranks Tom Hanks' 37 best films and, no surprise, the more prominent women are, the lower the films.


Which is how PUNCHLINE ends up at 32 even though it's still his best dramatic performance.

Ahead of the Sally Field co-starring and produced film?

Such 'classics' as BACHELOR PARTY.

His best Ron Howard film, SPLASH, comes in at 21 (it stars Daryl Hannah who isn't even noted in DeFore's blurb) while the creaky and preachy APOLLO 13 comes in at number three (the less women do onscreen, the more DeFore loves the film).


A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN -- with co-stars Geena Davis, Rosie O'Donnell, Madonna, Lori Petty, etc. -- comes in at number 16.


sis12


SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE and YOU'VE GOT MAIL tie for 11.  (And, as a 'bonus,' DeFore trashes director Nora Ephron.)


And then we get the preachy and homophobic PHILADELPHIA.

Homophobic?

Yes, that 1993 film where Tom Hanks' character has AIDS is deeply homophobic.

Unless of course we're supposed to believe Tom Hanks got AIDS from a handshake?

Were Hanks and Antonio Banderas supposed to be lovers?

Antonio's not shy about same-sex scenes -- check out his bottoming in LAWS OF DESIRE.

PHILADELPHIA is and was a bad film.  See Larry Kramer's excellent analysis of it for THE LOS ANGELES TIMES if you have any doubts.

And don't you dare argue that 'time's have changed' since the film came out.  The same year (1993) saw Gregg Araki's TOTTALLY F**KED UP, Yurek Bogayevicz' THREE OF HEARTS, Ang Lee's THE WEDDING BANQUET, John Greyson's ZERO PATIENCE, Gus Van Sant's EVEN COWGIRLS GET THE BLUES, Pedro Amodover's KIKA (Almodovar's LAWS OF DESIRE came out in 1987), Kaige Chen's FAREWELL MY CONCUBINE, Katt Shea's POISON IVY, Denys Arcand's LOVE AND HUMAN REMAINS, Fiona Cunnigham-Reid's FEED THEM TO THE CANNIBALS!, Edgr Michael Bravo's I'LL LOVE YOU FOREVER . . . TONIGHT (1992 but playing the 1993 film circuit), Ellen Spiro's GREETINGS FROM OUT HERE, Aerlyn Weissman and Lynne Fernie's FORBIDDEN LOVE: THE UNASHAMED STORIES OF LESBIAN LIVES (1992 but making its NYC debut in 1993), Cheryl Dunye's AN UNTITLED PORTRAIT and THE POTLUCK AND THE PASSION, Rico Martinez' GLAMAZON: A DIFFERENT KIND OF GIRL, etc.

Even the two in bed, clothed couldn't be seen.  (Click here for the 1:35 second scene that the director deleted insisting it -- the one minute and thirty-five second scene -- "slowed" the film down.)


Cowardly, homophobic, self-impressed and, most of all, as Larry Kramer pointed out, boring.

The hideous CHARLIE WILSON'S WAR comes in at 8. (THE HOLLYWOOD REPORTER has always been political reactionary.)

Steven Spielberg's awful BRIDGE OF SPIES and CATCH ME IF YOU CAN come in at 7 and 6 -- John Carpenter is a director, Spielberg's a joke


Spielberg's attempt at war pornography comes in at number 2 (SAVING PRIVATE RYAN).

And at number one?

The deeply racist CAPTAIN PHILLIPS.