Catherine: Excuse me, I overheard you two asking people if they want a cat and I'd really love one.
Caroline: Really? Well we have your cat.
Max: Oh now, woah, not so fast. I've got a couple of questions first. Do you smoke?
Cartherine: Yes.
Max: Drink?
Catherine: Yes.
Max: Prescription drugs?
Catherine: Yes.
Max: Forget the cat, will you take me home?
-- Max (Kat Dennings) and Caroline (Beth Behrs) find themselves with a stray cat which Catherine (Crista Flanagan) wants to adopt (2 Broke Girls, CBS Mondays).
Smiling, serious, kissing and Charlie's Angels. Classic photo booth big four.
-- Mindy (Mindy Kaling) going through mementos of her failed relationship with Casey (The Mindy Project, Fox Tuesdays).
Marty: This is a treadmill.
Dick Butkus: Oooooh.
Marty: Now this is the best way to get your heart rate up.
Dick Butkus: To do that, I usually just watch Hoda and Kathie Lee get hammered on The Today Show.
Marty: Yeah, I hear you.
-- alien Dick Butkis (Ian Patrick) tries to I Love Lucy (trick) Marty into getting into shape (The Neighbors, ABC Fridays).
Oooh! I had a bra like this once! Got me into concerts, got me into clubs, got me in the back of a limo with Fernando who I thought was a banker. Turned out to be the limo driver. Third time I've fallen for that.
-- Liz (Megan Hilty) takes Sean's 14-year-old daughter bra hunting (Sean Saves The World, NBC Thursdays)
Max: No, Kitty is not going to a shelter.
Caroline: Why? Lots of cats get adopted and end up in beautiful homes.
Max: Look I didn't want to say this but [covering cat's ears] she's not pretty enough.
Caroline: What are you talking about?
Max: [Covering cat's ears] She's not pretty enough.
Caroline: Come on, she doesn't have classic good looks but she's adorkable.
Max: We cannot take her to a shelter, [covering cat's ears] she'll die there. And yeah everyone says they want them with a nice personality but they really just want a hot sexy young kitten who still gets excited about balls in her face.
-- Max (Kat Dennings) and Caroline (Beth Behrs) have a stray cat issue (2 Broke Girls, CBS Mondays).
What do you mean I don't fulfill the delivery minimum? [Crying] I used to.
-- Mindy (Mindy Kaling) attempting to place a food order while dealing with her break up with Casey (The Mindy Project, Fox Tuesdays).
Bonnie: Why are you being such a bitch?
Violet: I'm just being honest.
Bonnie: Good I'll be honest too. You're being a bitch. And I use that word instead of the word I want to use because you're my granddaughter and I love you.
Violet: What? So I'm supposed to make a big deal just because she's going out with some random guy?
Bonnie: Excuse me young lady but your mother going out with some random guy is the only reason you exist.
-- Allison Janney (Bonnie) and Sadie Calvano (Violet) discuss niceties on CBS' Mom (airs Mondays).
Sue, it's just a job. You don't have to like what you do. It's like cleaning people's teeth or parenting.
-- Frankie (Patricia Heaton) attempts to help Sue adjust to her first job (The Middle, ABC Wednesdays).
Uhm, I've prepared a report highlighting our success with tech companies. Uh, oh. No, that's my Pretty Little Liars fantasy fiction. I make them all fat and ugly.
-- Kimmie (Rebel Wilson) attends a business meeting (Super Fun Night, Wednesdays ABC).
Lorna: When Ellie's mother moved to New York, I thought, 'Finally. This is it. I will be the main woman in Ellie's life.' Not this one.
Liz: Hey, this one has a name.
Lorna: And this one has a title: Grandmother -- a word that already has the word "mother" in it.
Liz: You know what else has the word "mother" in it?
Sean: Alright, you guys come on.
-- Sean (Sean Hayes) saves the moment as his mother Lorna (Linda Lavin) and his best friend Liz (Megan Hilty) argue on Sean Saves The World (NBC, Thursdays).